What, you want to breakup with your current special someone? No, I’m not gonna ask you “Are you sure?”. I’d like to ask you a straight question:
What valid reason do you have to want to get to that point?
Oh, I’m pretty sure you have a lot stored up there–and I mean a LOT. Reasons that are painfully incomparable with the other reasons.
You probably got tired–of everything.
The endless fights over shallow things and big deals.
Your special someone’s consistent insensitivity that hurt you.
The familiarity that makes your relationship boring.
And you might say “It’s more than that. You don’t even know what’s happening.”
Oh, I know. You meant the unacceptable truth about your relationship that only you two know. Secrets. Big, dark secrets.
You just found yourself tired of waiting for the things that you want to happen. Improvements. You might probably had a lot of talks in the past–serious talks. Made some ideal and sometimes even practical agreements to make things work out. But these petty agreements didn’t last long. Everything went back to a mess after a few days (or months). And you thought to yourself, “Maybe this is not going to work.”
Then you found yourself longing for something you’re not even sure what–and decided, maybe you need a space to think things over. Maybe if you breakup with that someone, you’ll find your true self back again. Maybe if you do it, you’d eventually realize if this relationship is worth fighting for.You thought it’s for the good. You got tired anyway. And you started to believe that you’re falling out of love with that someone.
When you look at his/her eyes, you just don’t find yourself loving this person anymore. No giddy feeling when you have plans for dinner. No butterflies in the stomach. Nothing.
What valid reason you do have to break-up with that someone?
You felt taken for granted.
You want to stop being treated like a trash.
You just want everything to end.
Are all these your reasons?
What if I ask you to just give me one valid reason why you should breakup?
Can you sum up everything in one true, plain, and unreserved statement?
You’d probably say “I just got tired.”
No. I don’t think so. I’m sure you still have 1% strength to push that through–but the drawbacks can be painful if you go on. You’ll be in a relationship where your heart is far from it. Still, that’s a 1%. It’s not completely exhaustion. It’s still not a valid reason.
Infidelity? No, not a valid reason. People who went through this situation and still ended up together would probably give you pieces of advice that contradict your personal basis.
Selfishness? Not a valid reason. Try telling it to couples who are madly in love with each other and they would say “Hey, you two can work these things out!”
You know what reason is valid?
You want a decision. A decision that you can take for the longest haul. You want a breakup because it’s the only decision that you can keep running consistently. You want something permanent–because you know most of the decisions you’ve made with that special someone just didn’t last. And you don’t want petty decisions anymore. Your mature heart just doesn’t want inconsistencies anymore–no, not ever. So you want a breakup…
…because you want a decision.